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still framed in your mind

you bet everything is still neatly hanged in my memory store . only this everything is not exactly like how i had once pictured it to be . it seems kind of the opposite . just like the picture below . i expected it to appear just like how i've viewed it in my flash drive . however when i uploaded it , it turned out being flipped upside down .

"so take the photographs and still frame in your mind , hang it on a shelf in good health and good times"
                                                                                                                 - Time of Your Life

reality - something that is not virtual . when you pinch yourself , you're totally not dreaming . you are viewing it first-person . it is fragile - once decision is made there's no backing out . it is either you made it or you ruined it . it's not a game which you can wait to be spawned again within seconds . it continues in a cycle - you have to go with it without buffering . you cannot always be on the top nor usually be the one at the bottom . it depends on how you will react towards a situation . it is for individual adventure - you have to make it through on your own . that's the scariest part of all .


when things got rough or imbalance . that's when your family , your buddies , your loved ones , well practically everybody came in the picture . they say nice things to you when you're sad . they cheer you up when you're feeling down . they support you when you participate in stuff . they give a pause to things when you're tired . they hang out with you when you need company . they tell how funny you can be when you crack jokes . they listen when you have stories though none of the stories make sense . they punch you on the stomach when you least expected it . they send you crappy text messages so you could laugh all day long thinking about it . they stay up so late when you can't sleep . they answer your call when you need to talk on your way to the toilet etc. . they stick up to you when people keep on denying . they hold your secrets to themselves . they befriend you buddies - perhaps to understand you more . they tell you that you're just being weird when you act plain stupid . they travel the long way in hopes to bump into you . they be honest only when they know you can handle the ugly truth if not , they lied just to make things simpler . they think of you as a sister , a brother . they will do anything especially for you . or else , it will be just YOU . just you and your back and you cannot summon anyone and you cannot choose the opt to 'need backup' or 'cover me' or 'get in position, i'm coming in' and no one offers you anything .

"when people wanted me to be somebody else but , you loved me completely"
                                                                                                         - Favourite Thing

well , you know , not all story ends with a happy ending . so , it is okay to screw up a bit in your life . be careful because you only have one life . and i am off to college again .

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