Hi .
Life's okay . And my friends hv said , "Those things you wanted never always the greatest decision you will ever make . Those cravings will never be as important as the ones you will need ."
Ever since I was little , never once in my life I have the courage to ask for more . When I want something , I just want it . If I do not get it then it's okay . I will not speak of it again . I seldomly ask for anything . I don't know what I want exactly for myself . Usually , my parents will provide us with things and then , we just explore .
During primary , teachers tought and I just learnt . I got good grades . I was short listed among great students . Always in the first class . Teachers know my name . Ive given the trust to help with money . I was just accepting . Accepting . You dont always want those things you accept .
In secondary , I started to look for something that will give me satisfaction . However , I found none . School was fun . School was great . School was everything . Was . But , I hv to leave school and Ive got to find something else that will keep me occupied . Somehow .
As I grow up , I learn that I have to want something in life so that I will have something to aim for - something to dream about . Something to crave . Something that will boost my effort to achieve that something I want .
I entered matriculation . I met new people . People with different identities . People with different backgrounds . People I hv not yet met before in my life but , I learn to get along well with them . When you're on your own , all you want is help . Help . Help . Help . I too , want help . To make it more obvious , I DESPERATELY NEED HELP .
I need help .
Remember when I was younger I only accept ? Ive never ask for anything because I do not know what I want ?
That was the problem I hv to face early in matriculation . I need help but I didnt know how to ask for any . I need help but I didnt hv anybody to turn to . I felt so naive . What do good grades , teachers' trust and my being in the first class all these years can do fr me now ?
To make it worst , I changed courses . I was a nobody again . I didnt know anything . Now can you imagine how desperate I was ?
I tried to help myself but I just didnt hv the knowledge . I didnt even got the guts to go fr cnsultation . It was plain stupid I guess until these few people I barely knew came and offered some of their HELP .
They help me escape the madness I was in . They help me know the things Ive never understand . I came to hv the enthusiast to explore the world more . They help me see things the way I hv never once in my life tried . I discover how life really feels for a second when suddenly things came crashing by . We left each other , that's what happened .
Now , I know what I want and what I need . I hope this is right . I want them and I need their help . I pray everyday to be with em again . Yesterday was the day Allah answered my prayer . We will once more be gathered in one place .
Ps : Grammar errors everywhere .
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